Trying to Detach from the Outcome

One of the hardest lessons in starting a new business is practicing the forth part of the Four-Fold Way* - detach from the outcome - or actually, “Be open to outcome, not attached to outcome”.

Sometimes we work so hard to put something together for a presentation, a customer, or a promotional opportunity, and then “nothing” happens. Of course, maybe something is happening but it just hasn’t materialized in a way that is obvious or can be measured.  Why is it that we like to see fruits of our labor?  Perhaps it is to know it was worth the effort, time and money, whatever.  What I tell myself when I’m in that uncomfortable place is that if we are truly coming from authenticity and following the path of our heart, something good will come of the effort even if it is never shown in a material way. Perhaps a seed was planted with someone somewhere and those efforts might eventually germinate to become to benefit someone.

I still have a lot of work to do on that but it is a comfort to know that it is something others struggle with at times.

*The Four-Fold Way is trademarked by Angeles Arrien, a well-known cultural anthropologist, who has written several books including and The Second Half of Life and The Tarot Handbook.  I was lucky to have had the opportunity to study with her at the California Institute of Integral Studies and more recently at a weekend workshop titled “Second Half of Life”.  Angie has written several books, and has educational programs that are detailed on her website, http://www.angeleesarrien.com.  Her Four-Fold Way in its briefest terms is stated below:

Show up and choose to be present
Pay attention to what has heart and meaning
Tell the truth without blame or judgment
Be open to outcome, not attached to outcome

Those have been very useful guidelines for me over the last 20 years, both in developing two retail businesses and while being a mental health counselor.  Maybe they can be of use to you.  If you have anything you’d like to share on this blog, please let me know.

Nancy Goodwin, Owner
www.creatingquietspaces.com
nancy@creatingquietspaces.com